Many of my friends and family are aware of the birth situation with my daughter, Makenna was born 10 weeks premature and only 2 pounds 4 ounces. We had a rough road for a long time, 2.5 months in the NICU, home with a feeding tube, doctor visits multiple days a week and lots and lots of stress. Makenna is now close to celebrating her second birthday and for the last few months I had thought the worst was behind us. I had began to count my blessings, yes we had been through some of the hardest days and weeks of our lives as a husband and wife, but we knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that we were blessed. Besides being small Makenna had no other complications from her otherwise complicated beginning in life. She was above average for her developmental tests and we collectively breathed a deep sigh of relief. Around Christmas of this year however, her doctor began to tell me she had some concerns about Makenna's size (old news right?) there were a few different red flags that were being raised that were urging her to send Makenna to an Endocrinologist to check and make sure there were no hormone imbalances causing not only slow weight gain but also short stature. I tried to push the visit until after Makenna's second birthday in June but her doctor was having non of my stall tactics. With much trepidation I scheduled Makenna's appointment for the middle of March. As the day draws nearer I have found myself feeling a lot of stress and anxiety, let me share with you what we know and are anticipating so far.
*Recent scientific studies have found that babies born prematurely due to the mother having Preeclampsia are increasingly short in stature and underweight. They also have found links to children born under these circumstances starting puberty much later in their teenage years, if at all, and in female children an increased link in infertility due to their bodies not fully developing properly.
*The above issues are at this point assumed to be caused by the lack of hormones (estrogen & testosterone) being passed from mother to child during pregnancy.
*As a result of the above mentioned, doctors are feeling it is appropriate and necessary to give these children growth hormone therapy which would mean a shot of the hormone every day until approximately 16 years old.
I won't go into my feelings about Makenna receiving this treatment until we know for sure she will even actually have to take it. Going back to the tender mercy I received...as I'm sure most mothers would do I have been stressing and worrying, chewing my finger nails to tiny nubbins, sleeping restlessly, snapping at my husband, withdrawing from friends and family so I don't have to pretend everything is "alright" etc. etc. The fact of the matter is, I'm scared. I'm scared I wont have a choice in whether or not Makenna has to take such a drastic course of action. I'm scared that with her having to be seen by a doctor in Wilmington almost an hour away this is going to cause stress and worry to our whole family. Appointments like this are not easy to go to alone, let alone take a 4 year old toddler to. Yes, I have gone through this type of stress before but my family was always there as a support system. I knew they would go out of their way to help in any way I needed. Now we live thousands of miles away and I'm scared. So flash forward to tonight, after one of the longest days in the history of long awful days I have to go help set up, monitor the nursery, tear down, and you know...just do all the things I absolutely didn't want to do. I didn't want to be there, I had cried more then half the day to overwhelmed to keep all my worry locked up inside. But I went. I went and I listened; and I was overcome with the tender mercies of the Lord. Every wonderful Sister who got up and spoke to us talked of ways in which the Relief Society has helped them in their lives and what a blessing it is. One Sister talked specifically about the importance of asking for help, the importance in admitting that things aren't ok. One other Sister talked about how she was afraid to move away from home, but upon arriving in Delaware found she already had a built in family, a support system. Everything these women talked about I knew, many things I have experienced countless times in my life and seen other women around me experience. But on this night I knew that "my loving Savior was sending me a most personal and timely message of comfort and reassurance through"...loving women of all ages and walks of life who extended their loving arms to all of us there tonight. "Some may count this experience as simply a nice coincidence, but I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord’s timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them." I don't know what will happen with Makenna, but I do know that if a storm is coming I have friends and yes, even 'family' here in Delaware to weather it with. For that I am grateful.
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